I am pigging on Snickers Almond bar at 2.15am.
How sinful!
Yummy snickers will be deposited on my tummy.
I was hungry. I tried to resist the Snickers bar but the moment I saw Dr Miranda Bailey ate a choc bar, I knew I had to eat mine.
Yeah, I am tv binging on Grey's Anatomy too... and House M.D. and Desperate Housewives and The Shield and Lost and ... and ...
I am addicted to addiction :Z
Wednesday, May 24, 2006
Tuesday, May 23, 2006
Bimboz gathered once again
I wish Metria is still here in Malaysia. If she was here, the bimboz group will be meeting very often. I missed those meet ups in Spicy Kitchen at Sri Hartamas.
Last evening, I was happy to be in the company of my good friends - Miki C, Bobo and Meloncrap, whom I barely meet these days. It was really nice to see you girls again. May our friendship last forever.
Well, we missed Cherub, Wan and Chinoz.
And Ah Beng too, yes, your fans miss you heaps and was dissapointed not able to take any photos or get hold of your signatures.
Nevermind, we will all meet again in Bobo's wedding next month.
And I hope that we can meet frequently, perhaps at least once a month. OK, girls?
Last evening, I was happy to be in the company of my good friends - Miki C, Bobo and Meloncrap, whom I barely meet these days. It was really nice to see you girls again. May our friendship last forever.
Well, we missed Cherub, Wan and Chinoz.
And Ah Beng too, yes, your fans miss you heaps and was dissapointed not able to take any photos or get hold of your signatures.
Nevermind, we will all meet again in Bobo's wedding next month.
And I hope that we can meet frequently, perhaps at least once a month. OK, girls?
Saturday, May 20, 2006
The Prayer for my friends
A song from my heart for Juni...
A dedication for Banker...
A comfort for sweet Sweety...
A pillar for Chinoz...
A light for Justin...
*** *** ***
The Prayer
I pray You'll be our eyes, and watch us where we go.
And help us to be wise in times when we don't know
Let this be our prayer, when we lose our way
Lead us to the place, guide us with Your grace
To a place where we'll be safe
La luce che tu hai
I pray we'll find Your light
nel cuore resterà
and hold it in our hearts.
a ricordarci che
When stars go out each night,
eterna stella sei
The light You have
I pray we'll find Your light
will be in the heart
and hold it in our hearts.
to remember us that
When stars go out each night,
You are eternal star
Nella mia preghiera
Let this be our prayer
quanta fede c'è
when shadows fill our day
How much faith there's
Let this be our prayer
in my prayer
when shadows fill our day
Lead us to a place, guide us with Your grace
Give us faith so we'll be safe
Sognamo un mondo senza più violenza
un mondo di giustizia e di speranza
Ognuno dia la mano al suo vicino
Simbolo di pace, di fraternità
We dream a world without violence
a world of justice and faith.
Everyone gives the hand to his neighbours
Symbol of peace, of fraternity
La forza che ci dà
We ask that life be kind
è il desiderio che
and watch us from above
ognuno trovi amor
We hope each soul will find
intorno e dentro sé
another soul to love
The force its gives us
We ask that life be kind
is wish that
and watch us from above
everyone finds love
We hope each soul will find
around and inside
another soul to love
Let this be our prayer
Let this be our prayer, just like every child
Need to find a place, guide us with Your grace
Give us faith so we'll be safe
Need to find a place, guide us with Your grace
Give us faith so we'll be safe
È la fede che
hai acceso in noi,
sento che ci salverà
It's the faith
You light in us
I feel it will save us
A dedication for Banker...
A comfort for sweet Sweety...
A pillar for Chinoz...
A light for Justin...
*** *** ***
The Prayer
I pray You'll be our eyes, and watch us where we go.
And help us to be wise in times when we don't know
Let this be our prayer, when we lose our way
Lead us to the place, guide us with Your grace
To a place where we'll be safe
La luce che tu hai
I pray we'll find Your light
nel cuore resterà
and hold it in our hearts.
a ricordarci che
When stars go out each night,
eterna stella sei
The light You have
I pray we'll find Your light
will be in the heart
and hold it in our hearts.
to remember us that
When stars go out each night,
You are eternal star
Nella mia preghiera
Let this be our prayer
quanta fede c'è
when shadows fill our day
How much faith there's
Let this be our prayer
in my prayer
when shadows fill our day
Lead us to a place, guide us with Your grace
Give us faith so we'll be safe
Sognamo un mondo senza più violenza
un mondo di giustizia e di speranza
Ognuno dia la mano al suo vicino
Simbolo di pace, di fraternità
We dream a world without violence
a world of justice and faith.
Everyone gives the hand to his neighbours
Symbol of peace, of fraternity
La forza che ci dà
We ask that life be kind
è il desiderio che
and watch us from above
ognuno trovi amor
We hope each soul will find
intorno e dentro sé
another soul to love
The force its gives us
We ask that life be kind
is wish that
and watch us from above
everyone finds love
We hope each soul will find
around and inside
another soul to love
Let this be our prayer
Let this be our prayer, just like every child
Need to find a place, guide us with Your grace
Give us faith so we'll be safe
Need to find a place, guide us with Your grace
Give us faith so we'll be safe
È la fede che
hai acceso in noi,
sento che ci salverà
It's the faith
You light in us
I feel it will save us
Thursday, May 18, 2006
Illusions
When loneliness is your only motivation,
When leaving is your only choice,
Isolation can seem like freedom,
Contact can seem like comfort,
Talk can seem like intimacy,
Attraction can seem like love,
And nowhere can seem like home.
When leaving is your only choice,
Isolation can seem like freedom,
Contact can seem like comfort,
Talk can seem like intimacy,
Attraction can seem like love,
And nowhere can seem like home.
Tuesday, May 16, 2006
Roughing it out at Sepayang Dam
Over the long weekend, I spent 3 days 2 nites at a reservoir in Endau which is called Empangan Sepayang where a group of 8 other people (minus me) went fishing for Tomans. I just doesn't like the idea of killing or hurting any other living object, so no fishing for me.
It was indeed an experience for me to be there. The weather was really hot and staying indoors equal to a sauna room meanwhile staying outdoor will risk a sun burn. The huts on the rakit (raft) is very basic, with no electricity or clean waters. Besides building a camp, our lifestyle for the 3 days stay there was exactly like camping. I bet you can imagine what it was like. It just reminded me of my scout days back in Uni.
Lucky Samurai did feel so bad asking me there. And I am sorry for making him feel that way. I did not whine, but I guess from the perpetual frown on my face, everyone can sensed that I wasn't enjoying myself there. Actually I did, but just the heat and the dirty-ness bothered me. Other than that, I was quite happy to be there and am proud of myself that I actually managed to cope being there.
Yes, the place is beautiful. Nice scenery and nice sunrise. Here are the pictures, guess they speak a thousand words.
If Layang-layang has beautiful sunset, then here has the most vivid sunrise. I watched the sun rised slowly from the horizon of calm water, partly hidden behind clouds and then to its full glory.
Perfect full moon, glistening like a strip of gold on the surface of water. The nite was so bright and alive. Full moon just bring back so much memories of someone.
The hut that me and 3 other guys lived in. Pathetically, it looked and actually felt very much like a rumah setinggan. I was actually worried that it might just fall apart. Sigh!
Inside the hut. Not very appealing either. Loads of lizzie's shit everywhere. I was traumatised when I first stepped in. But that blue camp bed was very comfortable to sleep in.
Early in the morning. Mist over the mountains. So peaceful.
Rays from Heaven. Very inspirational.
The view from the toilet. It was very picturesque and calms you down while you do what you need to do. The so-called toilet is in the open, with a big square hole in between the wooden planks where you release the unwanted into the water. Yup, the same water where you bathe, swim, wash and fish in.
It was indeed an experience for me to be there. The weather was really hot and staying indoors equal to a sauna room meanwhile staying outdoor will risk a sun burn. The huts on the rakit (raft) is very basic, with no electricity or clean waters. Besides building a camp, our lifestyle for the 3 days stay there was exactly like camping. I bet you can imagine what it was like. It just reminded me of my scout days back in Uni.
Lucky Samurai did feel so bad asking me there. And I am sorry for making him feel that way. I did not whine, but I guess from the perpetual frown on my face, everyone can sensed that I wasn't enjoying myself there. Actually I did, but just the heat and the dirty-ness bothered me. Other than that, I was quite happy to be there and am proud of myself that I actually managed to cope being there.
Yes, the place is beautiful. Nice scenery and nice sunrise. Here are the pictures, guess they speak a thousand words.
Thursday, May 11, 2006
Live on Raft
Like what you see in this photo. I am heading off to this place for the long weekend. I will tell you more when I get back. This time, it is really no electricity at all, which means no telephone line and no internet. Total cut off to the outside world. And I have no freaking idea where it is. All I know I am going to live in a raft either in a river or a dam.
Wednesday, May 03, 2006
Love
The Bible tells us again and again that we should love one another. Love is like the glue that holds us all together. The apostle John wrote, "Beloved, let us love one another, for love is of God; and everyone who loves is born of God and knows God" (1 John 4:7).
Well, don't focus so much on what love is, but on what love does and does not do. The love that we are to demonstrate toward one another is not merely feeling or emotion. Nor is it abstract or passive. It is active. It engages. It works. It moves. Love does not merely feel patient; it is patient. Love does not simply have kind feelings; it does kind things. Love is fully love only when it is active. Let us not love in word or in tongue, but in deed and in truth.
Finally, as we all have already read many many times, I am putting it down again, in this blog, verses from 1 Corinthians 13...
Love is patient, Love is kind and envies no one.
Love is never boastful, nor conceited, nor rude;
Never selfish, not quick to take offense.
There is nothing love cannot face;
There is no limit to its faith,
Its hope, and endurance.
In a word, there are three things
That last forever: faith, hope, and love;
But the greatest of them all is love.
Well, don't focus so much on what love is, but on what love does and does not do. The love that we are to demonstrate toward one another is not merely feeling or emotion. Nor is it abstract or passive. It is active. It engages. It works. It moves. Love does not merely feel patient; it is patient. Love does not simply have kind feelings; it does kind things. Love is fully love only when it is active. Let us not love in word or in tongue, but in deed and in truth.
Finally, as we all have already read many many times, I am putting it down again, in this blog, verses from 1 Corinthians 13...
Love is patient, Love is kind and envies no one.
Love is never boastful, nor conceited, nor rude;
Never selfish, not quick to take offense.
There is nothing love cannot face;
There is no limit to its faith,
Its hope, and endurance.
In a word, there are three things
That last forever: faith, hope, and love;
But the greatest of them all is love.
Monday, May 01, 2006
Pix from midst air
Sunday, April 30, 2006
From midst air
Right now I am in KK. My flight back to KL was delayed as expected from Air Asia for an hour. They won't let us enter the departure hall so I have to hang out in an open air cafe facing the carpark. It is very hot here. I am sweating buckets since I came to this part of the world, kinda like sauna.
As I flying back from Layang-Layang on a really small plane that can only fit 8 passengers, I must say that the view from the window is nice. There were only 3 of us in the plane, me and a friendly French couple that I have made friends with. They were also on the same diving boat as me during the past 5 days.
Sometimes, as I looked out the plane window, the sea merged to the sky and clouds, forming a beautiful bluish gradient as you look up and into fluffy white clouds.
At times, I can see the orangy shades or even purplish shades over the horizon, with soft cottony clouds hanging in the sky, creating interesting hues as the lights sneaking on the side of the clouds.
As the plane flew across the South China Sea, it is rather comforting to see speckles of boats and ships on the sea, knowing there is life going about the surface of the sea. I saw 2 oil platforms too. And straight lines across the sea made by speed boats, kinda like patterns made by plane across the sky.
Patches of coral beds underwater can be seen, where shallow waters are in soft and lighter blue, where no divers go to and these are peaceful and undisturbed sanctuaries for the marine life. I wonder what are swimming in there and what treasure can you find.
Although It was sad to see oil spill as we are nearing to the main land. The colourful metallic gradient on the surface was very worrying, and I wonder how do one clean up this mess. I wonder how many marine life has been affected :(
And you know you are leaving all the slow easy happy moments behind as you approach the mainland, leaving the blue sea below and behind you and looking at roof tops and maze of roads.
But of course, the touchdown. The little aircraft door opened, the hot humid air gushed in, and the lowering noise of the aircraft engine...and stepping on the hard landing strip, oh well, back to reality again in the next few hours. Back to work, back to the traffic jam and back to classes.
Till the next island, and the next diving trip...
P/S: Will post photos of sky taken from the plane windo in my next post :)
As I flying back from Layang-Layang on a really small plane that can only fit 8 passengers, I must say that the view from the window is nice. There were only 3 of us in the plane, me and a friendly French couple that I have made friends with. They were also on the same diving boat as me during the past 5 days.
Sometimes, as I looked out the plane window, the sea merged to the sky and clouds, forming a beautiful bluish gradient as you look up and into fluffy white clouds.
At times, I can see the orangy shades or even purplish shades over the horizon, with soft cottony clouds hanging in the sky, creating interesting hues as the lights sneaking on the side of the clouds.
As the plane flew across the South China Sea, it is rather comforting to see speckles of boats and ships on the sea, knowing there is life going about the surface of the sea. I saw 2 oil platforms too. And straight lines across the sea made by speed boats, kinda like patterns made by plane across the sky.
Patches of coral beds underwater can be seen, where shallow waters are in soft and lighter blue, where no divers go to and these are peaceful and undisturbed sanctuaries for the marine life. I wonder what are swimming in there and what treasure can you find.
Although It was sad to see oil spill as we are nearing to the main land. The colourful metallic gradient on the surface was very worrying, and I wonder how do one clean up this mess. I wonder how many marine life has been affected :(
And you know you are leaving all the slow easy happy moments behind as you approach the mainland, leaving the blue sea below and behind you and looking at roof tops and maze of roads.
But of course, the touchdown. The little aircraft door opened, the hot humid air gushed in, and the lowering noise of the aircraft engine...and stepping on the hard landing strip, oh well, back to reality again in the next few hours. Back to work, back to the traffic jam and back to classes.
Till the next island, and the next diving trip...
P/S: Will post photos of sky taken from the plane windo in my next post :)
Saturday, April 29, 2006
More Pix from Kite Kite
Last nite at Kite Kite
My last nite in Kite Kite. It was quite sad to clean up my gears this afternoon, after my last dive. Anyway, I did 2 dives this morning and in my first dive, I was lucky to see a school of hammerheads passing by us. It is estimated to be 40 of them. I can only say WOW! Asther said she had good dream last nite and she could feel good vibes. And yeah... it was indeed good karma.
Only no mantas to be seen. But never mind. I am happy. Also saw a big fat grey reef shark, a cute box fish (black with yellow polka dots) and I was right smacked in the center of a big school of Jacks. I float among them for a bit. That was amazing.
Visited a really small island where the birds migrated there during this time of the year to lay eggs and nurture their youngs. It was stinky due the birds' droppings and it was noisy as there are so many birds. But it was beautiful to see nature at its best.
Last nite, I was thrown into the pool by a French diver unexpectedly. It was their last day today for all the 30 divers from France. That's the only time I actually swam in that pool. Luckily, the water was warm. The only problem is my wet hair and I went to sleep with wet hair. Anyway, I impressed the French with Maxime de la Forrestier's songs, which was given to me by Pele.
Tonite, we are having a big BBQ dinner. Now just hanging out at the bar, with some DMs and divers, while blogging. It is so humid and warm here and I am sweating.
And overlooking a beautiful sunset, I sat next to a Japanese lady with really short hair that came with me to Kite Kite on the same day and found out that she came here alone too. She has been diving with her husband all these while until he passed away in January this year. Since then, she has been diving alone. She told me that she sometimes get lonely. I could sense that she was missing him so much as she gazed into the horizon. I wonder how many sunsets they have watched together over the years during their diving trips. All I did was said sorry and gave her a hug. And she gently said "Arigato".
Only no mantas to be seen. But never mind. I am happy. Also saw a big fat grey reef shark, a cute box fish (black with yellow polka dots) and I was right smacked in the center of a big school of Jacks. I float among them for a bit. That was amazing.
Visited a really small island where the birds migrated there during this time of the year to lay eggs and nurture their youngs. It was stinky due the birds' droppings and it was noisy as there are so many birds. But it was beautiful to see nature at its best.
Last nite, I was thrown into the pool by a French diver unexpectedly. It was their last day today for all the 30 divers from France. That's the only time I actually swam in that pool. Luckily, the water was warm. The only problem is my wet hair and I went to sleep with wet hair. Anyway, I impressed the French with Maxime de la Forrestier's songs, which was given to me by Pele.
Tonite, we are having a big BBQ dinner. Now just hanging out at the bar, with some DMs and divers, while blogging. It is so humid and warm here and I am sweating.
And overlooking a beautiful sunset, I sat next to a Japanese lady with really short hair that came with me to Kite Kite on the same day and found out that she came here alone too. She has been diving with her husband all these while until he passed away in January this year. Since then, she has been diving alone. She told me that she sometimes get lonely. I could sense that she was missing him so much as she gazed into the horizon. I wonder how many sunsets they have watched together over the years during their diving trips. All I did was said sorry and gave her a hug. And she gently said "Arigato".
Friday, April 28, 2006
Pix from Kite Kite
Pix not taken by me but by other divers.
Thursday, April 27, 2006
Diving tales
Diving is really nice here. Easy going. 3 dives a day. Nice weather. Eat, dive, eat, rest, dive, eat, rest, dive, eat, rest and sleep. Met a lot new friends, nice people here and they take care of me, which I am grateful.
Tuesday. Day 1 in Layang Layang.
Woke up at 4.15am, showered and had breakfast in the hotel then to the airport. They serve breakfast starting at 4am in the hotel. That was so early. Had nasi lemak and bubur. Then to airport by taxi.
When I arrived in the airport, I met Eugene, the person in charge of the Layang-Layang Dive Resort. After, I met Dr Kurt Svacula, the author of "Diving in Malaysia" book. I thought to myself, that is a good start. Fly in a really small plane where it can only fit max 12 people, depending on the weight. They weigh all our luggage and all the passenger before boarding us to the plane.
Did 2 dives today, one before lunch and one after lunch. Very nice corals landscape. Best I've ever seen. Well, not that I have seen a lot or enough to even give that kind of comment. No hammerheads, no mantas. I will not ask that question coz I have been warned not to. Have a german guy the name of Ramin, by who is lawyer that specialised in Mergers and Acquisation of company as a buddy. He is all over the place. So hard to keep up with him. Very cute, nice eyes, soft spoken, very funny...ahh... never mind.
Wednesday. Day 2 in Layang-Layang.
It only got better being here. I am glad I came. Met new friends and that is really cool. Asther been taking good care of me. It is Wednesday and it is a working day. But I am in an island, not working. How nice is that?
Did 3 dives and was dissapointed coz yet to see "it". But am keeping my fingers crossed.
The highlight of today was that I saw dolphins as we are going back to the island on the last dive today. They were jumping out of the water next to our boat. One did a double somersault. It is such an amazing experience to see them playing.
Thursday. 27 April 06.
Day 3 in Layang-Layang.
Amazing day. Happiest day. Saw a hammerhead in the first dive, out in the deep blue. Oh yes, we dive to the deep blue in most of our dives to search for hammerheads and mantas. It is such liberating feeling to dive to the deep blue. Nothingness, surrounded by the blue water all around and floating in it.
On second dive, we saw a school of devil rays. So beautiful to see them swimming in formation. 12 of them. So graceful. Saw unicorn fish, leaf fish, octopus, a reef grey shark, school of Jacks and barracudas. But I had seasick and feeling really awful but seeing the hammerhead made it worthwhile. I did not take Nuvomin yesterday and today.
On third dive, it was a bit cloudy and visibility ain't that great. It was a wall diving. Nothing much but saw a moray eel, a juvenile file fish and four sharks. So cute, really tiny and I like it.
I hope tomorrow will be another good and lucky day for diving. I want to see Mantas. I will try to post some pix up :)
Tuesday. Day 1 in Layang Layang.
Woke up at 4.15am, showered and had breakfast in the hotel then to the airport. They serve breakfast starting at 4am in the hotel. That was so early. Had nasi lemak and bubur. Then to airport by taxi.
When I arrived in the airport, I met Eugene, the person in charge of the Layang-Layang Dive Resort. After, I met Dr Kurt Svacula, the author of "Diving in Malaysia" book. I thought to myself, that is a good start. Fly in a really small plane where it can only fit max 12 people, depending on the weight. They weigh all our luggage and all the passenger before boarding us to the plane.
Did 2 dives today, one before lunch and one after lunch. Very nice corals landscape. Best I've ever seen. Well, not that I have seen a lot or enough to even give that kind of comment. No hammerheads, no mantas. I will not ask that question coz I have been warned not to. Have a german guy the name of Ramin, by who is lawyer that specialised in Mergers and Acquisation of company as a buddy. He is all over the place. So hard to keep up with him. Very cute, nice eyes, soft spoken, very funny...ahh... never mind.
Wednesday. Day 2 in Layang-Layang.
It only got better being here. I am glad I came. Met new friends and that is really cool. Asther been taking good care of me. It is Wednesday and it is a working day. But I am in an island, not working. How nice is that?
Did 3 dives and was dissapointed coz yet to see "it". But am keeping my fingers crossed.
The highlight of today was that I saw dolphins as we are going back to the island on the last dive today. They were jumping out of the water next to our boat. One did a double somersault. It is such an amazing experience to see them playing.
Thursday. 27 April 06.
Day 3 in Layang-Layang.
Amazing day. Happiest day. Saw a hammerhead in the first dive, out in the deep blue. Oh yes, we dive to the deep blue in most of our dives to search for hammerheads and mantas. It is such liberating feeling to dive to the deep blue. Nothingness, surrounded by the blue water all around and floating in it.
On second dive, we saw a school of devil rays. So beautiful to see them swimming in formation. 12 of them. So graceful. Saw unicorn fish, leaf fish, octopus, a reef grey shark, school of Jacks and barracudas. But I had seasick and feeling really awful but seeing the hammerhead made it worthwhile. I did not take Nuvomin yesterday and today.
On third dive, it was a bit cloudy and visibility ain't that great. It was a wall diving. Nothing much but saw a moray eel, a juvenile file fish and four sharks. So cute, really tiny and I like it.
I hope tomorrow will be another good and lucky day for diving. I want to see Mantas. I will try to post some pix up :)
Wednesday, April 26, 2006
In a hotel in KK on Mon nite
Phew...finally got online. Made friends with the guy running the resort in the island and my divemaster friend helps too in gaining access.
Here is my post which I wrote in the hotel on Monday nite. Will post more on what's been happening here.
*** *** ***
In a hotel room now in KK. It is very boring. Was watching some local Malay drama and then some el cheapo English speaking but with Mexican accent movie on TV2. Crap! Not much choices for channel surfing.
As per advised by Arizona, I am writing a journal whenever I am bored or got nothing to do. That's what I am doing now exactly.
And I so wish there is an Internet access here. But no, the only place with Internet access is the Business Centre and it is closed. But at least I have my computer with me where I can listen to music while I journaled. By tomorrow, I will lose all communication means as there is no Maxis signal or Internet acces there, unless I pay a bomb to contact anyone.
Asther just called me to check I am ok. Sweet isn't she? And right now, I am sms-ing Delphinus and Rob. Delphinus told me that Gervais was stuck in the traffic for 2 hours after sending me to LCCT. Oh dear, I am so sorry. Bak Kut Teh on me when I am back to KL. I must say that Gervais is so sweet to send me from my office to the airport this afternoon. I gladly accept his offer coz I have 1 huge bag, 1 bag pack and 1 small bag. Gervais also lend me his digital camera for this trip as I don't have any. I can't take any underwater photography but will take some pictures of the island and perhaps birds.
I have to go to bed early tonite, which is too early comparing to my daily go to bed schedule, cos I need to wake up at around 4.15 am tomorrow for breakfast and then leave to airport. My flight to Layang Layang is at 6.30am. Maybe I'll watch an episode of Out of Practice before I sleep.
Oh yes, note to self. I must not leave anything behind as I have this bad habit of forgetting to take my things and leaving them everywhere.
Gotta record this down. As I was watching TV2 just now, the sight and sound brought back a very familiar yet distant feeling. I can't help but having this nostalgic feeling of me back in my grandma's home in Melaka. It reminded me of the typical night back then, where there are only 3 channels to watch and the TV is on every night. Grandma will be watching the drama on TV with a very loud volume coz she was a bit deaf. I could almost see the entire surrounding of my grandma's home in Melaka quite vividly and I felt as if I was still that teenager who live there. At that moment, I miss my grandma, I miss those times, I miss my sister, I miss my dad and I miss the familiarity of a home which I have lived in for 20 years.
Here is my post which I wrote in the hotel on Monday nite. Will post more on what's been happening here.
*** *** ***
In a hotel room now in KK. It is very boring. Was watching some local Malay drama and then some el cheapo English speaking but with Mexican accent movie on TV2. Crap! Not much choices for channel surfing.
As per advised by Arizona, I am writing a journal whenever I am bored or got nothing to do. That's what I am doing now exactly.
And I so wish there is an Internet access here. But no, the only place with Internet access is the Business Centre and it is closed. But at least I have my computer with me where I can listen to music while I journaled. By tomorrow, I will lose all communication means as there is no Maxis signal or Internet acces there, unless I pay a bomb to contact anyone.
Asther just called me to check I am ok. Sweet isn't she? And right now, I am sms-ing Delphinus and Rob. Delphinus told me that Gervais was stuck in the traffic for 2 hours after sending me to LCCT. Oh dear, I am so sorry. Bak Kut Teh on me when I am back to KL. I must say that Gervais is so sweet to send me from my office to the airport this afternoon. I gladly accept his offer coz I have 1 huge bag, 1 bag pack and 1 small bag. Gervais also lend me his digital camera for this trip as I don't have any. I can't take any underwater photography but will take some pictures of the island and perhaps birds.
I have to go to bed early tonite, which is too early comparing to my daily go to bed schedule, cos I need to wake up at around 4.15 am tomorrow for breakfast and then leave to airport. My flight to Layang Layang is at 6.30am. Maybe I'll watch an episode of Out of Practice before I sleep.
Oh yes, note to self. I must not leave anything behind as I have this bad habit of forgetting to take my things and leaving them everywhere.
Gotta record this down. As I was watching TV2 just now, the sight and sound brought back a very familiar yet distant feeling. I can't help but having this nostalgic feeling of me back in my grandma's home in Melaka. It reminded me of the typical night back then, where there are only 3 channels to watch and the TV is on every night. Grandma will be watching the drama on TV with a very loud volume coz she was a bit deaf. I could almost see the entire surrounding of my grandma's home in Melaka quite vividly and I felt as if I was still that teenager who live there. At that moment, I miss my grandma, I miss those times, I miss my sister, I miss my dad and I miss the familiarity of a home which I have lived in for 20 years.
Monday, April 24, 2006
Off I go
I am off to an atoll for diving for 6 days. I am leaving this evening. My bags are packed.
I am excited because I am hopeful to see hammerhead sharks and manta rays. I am going diving. I am going to be in an island. I don't have to work.
But I am a bit heavy hearted coz I am going there all alone. I dunno how I am gonna cope with that, but I shall take it as a challenge. It was a wonderful plan initially but it fell through and it is a hard decision to still go. I am broke.
There won't be any Internet or Maxis there, so I am cut off from my everyday world. But I'll be back in a week's time. Meanwhile, take care, have fun and smile.
I am excited because I am hopeful to see hammerhead sharks and manta rays. I am going diving. I am going to be in an island. I don't have to work.
But I am a bit heavy hearted coz I am going there all alone. I dunno how I am gonna cope with that, but I shall take it as a challenge. It was a wonderful plan initially but it fell through and it is a hard decision to still go. I am broke.
There won't be any Internet or Maxis there, so I am cut off from my everyday world. But I'll be back in a week's time. Meanwhile, take care, have fun and smile.
Sunday, April 23, 2006
Never leave till tomorrow
A couple of hundred years ago, Benjamin Franklin shared with the world the secret of his success. Never leave that till tomorrow, he said, which you can do today. This is the man who discovered electricity. You think more people would listen to what he had to say. I don't know why we put things off, but if I had to guess, I'd have to say it has a lot to do with fear. Fear of failure, fear of rejection, sometimes the fear is just of making a decision, because what if you're wrong? What if you're making a mistake you can't undo? The early bird catches the worm. A stitch in time saves nine. He who hesitates is lost. We can't pretend we hadn't been told. We've all heard the proverbs, heard the philosophers, heard our grandparents warning us about wasted time, heard the damn poets urging us to seize the day. Still sometimes we have to see for ourselves. We have to make our own mistakes. We have to learn our own lessons. We have to sweep today's possibility under tomorrow's rug until we can't anymore. Until we finally understand for ourselves what Benjamin Franklin really meant. That knowing is better than wondering, that waking is better than sleeping, and even the biggest failure, even the worst, beat the hell out of never trying.
~ Meredith Grey of Grey's Anatomy
I just wish I did it. But I was too afraid and too worried :(
~ Meredith Grey of Grey's Anatomy
I just wish I did it. But I was too afraid and too worried :(
Saturday, April 22, 2006
Month of choc cake & breakups
Chocolate Cakes. I ate so much of it lately, for the past few weeks. One of my colleagues found a simple recipe to bake chocolate cake without butter. She attempted it and we all love it. Inspired by her success, three other colleagues tried the recipe too. They even have a competition on who bake the tastiest chocolate cake. And I get to eat everyone's chocolate cake. Almost everyday.
Pele too has been baking brownies. Yummylicious brownies. And I was lucky to eat them on both times he baked them. I even took home some. Earlier, he introduced us to L'Opera and Royal cakes from Chef Jerome. My goodness, the taste are heavenly.
So, I guess for while now, I will avoid chocolate cakes. But I believe there will still be continous supply of chocolate cakes for a while. Oh, I just ate 4 pieces of brownies baked by Pele :D Yum Yum.
Breakups. Very disconcerting. First time in my life, I have so many friends broke up with their partners in one month. Sad!
Early this morning, a friend called up to inform me of a bad news. Both parties are my friends. Sad. They were so in love, but circumstances posed as a hurdles they cannot jump over.
Two other unfortunate friends have lost contacts with their boyfriends. The boyfriends stopped calling, leaving them wondering in sadness. But love is so great that it leaves hope for both of them, that perhaps, the calling stopped due to a very good reason. The hope and the trust for that someone in good faith, all because of the love in the heart. And hope springs eternal.
A few more suffer silently... Hang in there, buddies.
When there are breakups, chocolates are good for the soul. Now I see the connection.
Pele too has been baking brownies. Yummylicious brownies. And I was lucky to eat them on both times he baked them. I even took home some. Earlier, he introduced us to L'Opera and Royal cakes from Chef Jerome. My goodness, the taste are heavenly.
So, I guess for while now, I will avoid chocolate cakes. But I believe there will still be continous supply of chocolate cakes for a while. Oh, I just ate 4 pieces of brownies baked by Pele :D Yum Yum.
Breakups. Very disconcerting. First time in my life, I have so many friends broke up with their partners in one month. Sad!
Early this morning, a friend called up to inform me of a bad news. Both parties are my friends. Sad. They were so in love, but circumstances posed as a hurdles they cannot jump over.
Two other unfortunate friends have lost contacts with their boyfriends. The boyfriends stopped calling, leaving them wondering in sadness. But love is so great that it leaves hope for both of them, that perhaps, the calling stopped due to a very good reason. The hope and the trust for that someone in good faith, all because of the love in the heart. And hope springs eternal.
A few more suffer silently... Hang in there, buddies.
When there are breakups, chocolates are good for the soul. Now I see the connection.
Friday, April 21, 2006
Bits of Emotions 3
I walk in the rain that’s fallin’
A voice in the distance callin’, why
I run to the empty doorway waitin’ for the sun to shine
When will love be mine
~ Somewhere, Somebody by Jennifer Warnes
*** *** ***
Tap on my window knock on my door
I want to make you feel beautiful
I know I tend to get insecure
It doesn’t matter anymore
It’s not always rainbows and butterflies
It’s compromise that moves us along
My heart is full and my door’s always open
You can come anytime you want
~ She Will Be Loved by Maroon 5
*** *** ***
There are only so many tears you can cry
Till your heart stops breaking
Only so many doors you can try
Till you finally find your way
Out of the dark, into the light
No, the clouds won't always be grey
The sun reappears in the blink of an eye
And there's only so many tears you can cry
~ Only So Many Tears by Beth Nielsen Chapman
*** *** ***
You take it as it comes
When you've got no way to hide from the hurting inside
When there's nowhere you can really run
You take it as it comes
And one foot goes in front of the other
And one day rolls into the next
Sometimes you've got to let your heart be numb
And take it as it comes
~ Take It As It Comes by Beth Nielsen Chapman
*** *** ***
I could feel it go down
bittersweet i could taste in my mouth
silver lining the clouds
and i
i wish that i could work it out
and the hardest part
was letting go not taking part
you really broke my heart
and i tried to sing
but i couldn't think of anything
it was the hardest part
everything i know is wrong
everything i do it just comes undone
and everything is torn apart
oh and thats the hardest part
thats the hardest part
~ The Hardest Part by Coldplay
*** *** ***
Oh, mirror in the sky
What is love
Can the child within my heart rise above
Can I sail thru the changing ocean tides
Can I handle the seasons of my life
~ Landslide by Dixie Chicks
A voice in the distance callin’, why
I run to the empty doorway waitin’ for the sun to shine
When will love be mine
~ Somewhere, Somebody by Jennifer Warnes
*** *** ***
Tap on my window knock on my door
I want to make you feel beautiful
I know I tend to get insecure
It doesn’t matter anymore
It’s not always rainbows and butterflies
It’s compromise that moves us along
My heart is full and my door’s always open
You can come anytime you want
~ She Will Be Loved by Maroon 5
*** *** ***
There are only so many tears you can cry
Till your heart stops breaking
Only so many doors you can try
Till you finally find your way
Out of the dark, into the light
No, the clouds won't always be grey
The sun reappears in the blink of an eye
And there's only so many tears you can cry
~ Only So Many Tears by Beth Nielsen Chapman
*** *** ***
You take it as it comes
When you've got no way to hide from the hurting inside
When there's nowhere you can really run
You take it as it comes
And one foot goes in front of the other
And one day rolls into the next
Sometimes you've got to let your heart be numb
And take it as it comes
~ Take It As It Comes by Beth Nielsen Chapman
*** *** ***
I could feel it go down
bittersweet i could taste in my mouth
silver lining the clouds
and i
i wish that i could work it out
and the hardest part
was letting go not taking part
you really broke my heart
and i tried to sing
but i couldn't think of anything
it was the hardest part
everything i know is wrong
everything i do it just comes undone
and everything is torn apart
oh and thats the hardest part
thats the hardest part
~ The Hardest Part by Coldplay
*** *** ***
Oh, mirror in the sky
What is love
Can the child within my heart rise above
Can I sail thru the changing ocean tides
Can I handle the seasons of my life
~ Landslide by Dixie Chicks
What is Thy will?
Dogs are barking and howling outside. It is kinda eerie at this hour. I am still awake, quite fresh, actually. I need to sleep no matter what, or else tomorrow will be an awful long day.
But meanwhile, I am here pondering if God really listen to our prayers and work His miracle on us. Or is He someone who continues to challenge us, testing our faith towards Him? Or He is someone who blessed us with good things all the time?
Well, say what you like. When times are bad, God is testing us. When time is good, it is God's blessing. You can never win. Seems like God knows it all and what is best for us. His will is not to be questioned but to be trusted upon.
Most people will remember God during time of stress and difficulties, where they will fervently pray for a miracle from God to change and improve their situation. On a happy day, God or no God, some don't really need Him. This usually how someone who is lackadaisical with God matters be like.
But as many as those that will turn to God in difficulties, many people actually lose faith in God and gave up on Him when they are down in the dumps. They were angry with God. They can't understand why God will let bad things happen to them. They walk away from God. They lose faith that God. They dislike not knowing God's will. They questioned why is God's will so hard to comprehend?
We all know that we can always pray to Him in the midst of difficult circumstances. Anyone can pray when things are going well. It is easy. But when the bottom drops out, when hardship hits, can we still keep singing our praises to God? Or do we be complacent and just forget God when times are good?
But meanwhile, I am here pondering if God really listen to our prayers and work His miracle on us. Or is He someone who continues to challenge us, testing our faith towards Him? Or He is someone who blessed us with good things all the time?
Well, say what you like. When times are bad, God is testing us. When time is good, it is God's blessing. You can never win. Seems like God knows it all and what is best for us. His will is not to be questioned but to be trusted upon.
Most people will remember God during time of stress and difficulties, where they will fervently pray for a miracle from God to change and improve their situation. On a happy day, God or no God, some don't really need Him. This usually how someone who is lackadaisical with God matters be like.
But as many as those that will turn to God in difficulties, many people actually lose faith in God and gave up on Him when they are down in the dumps. They were angry with God. They can't understand why God will let bad things happen to them. They walk away from God. They lose faith that God. They dislike not knowing God's will. They questioned why is God's will so hard to comprehend?
We all know that we can always pray to Him in the midst of difficult circumstances. Anyone can pray when things are going well. It is easy. But when the bottom drops out, when hardship hits, can we still keep singing our praises to God? Or do we be complacent and just forget God when times are good?
Wednesday, April 19, 2006
A view on Love thru a song
I asked a friend if he would describe how he view his love through a song, which song would that be. He told me this song below is how he is feeling. When I read it, I knew instantly how apt it is.
I Want To Know What Love Is
by Foreigner
I gotta take a little time
A little time to think things over
I better read between the lines
In case I need it when I’m older
Now this mountain I must climb
Feels like a world upon my shoulders
I through the clouds I see love shine
It keeps me warm as life grows colder
In my life there’s been heartache and pain
I don’t know if I can face it again
Can’t stop now, I’ve traveled so far
To change this lonely life
I wanna know what love is
I want you to show me
I wanna feel what love is
I know you can show me
I’m gonna take a little time
A little time to look around me
I’ve got nowhere left to hide
It looks like love has finally found me
In my life there’s been heartache and pain
I don’t know if I can face it again
I can’t stop now, I’ve traveled so far
To change this lonely life
I wanna know what love is
I want you to show me
I wanna feel what love is
I know you can show me
I wanna know what love is
I want you to show me
And I wanna feel, I want to feel what love is
And I know, I know you can show me
Let’s talk about love
I wanna know what love is, the love that you feel inside
I want you to show me, and I’m feeling so much love
I wanna feel what love is, no, you just cannot hide
I know you can show me, yeah
I wanna know what love is, let’s talk about love
I want you to show me, I wanna feel it too
I wanna feel what love is, I want to feel it too
And I know and I know, I know you can show me
Show me love is real, yeah
I wanna know what love is...
Well, don't we (those who are still searching for the person to share the life and love with) all feel the same too?
And as a consolation, listen to the song by Jennifer Warnes by the title of Somewhere, Somebody.
I Want To Know What Love Is
by Foreigner
I gotta take a little time
A little time to think things over
I better read between the lines
In case I need it when I’m older
Now this mountain I must climb
Feels like a world upon my shoulders
I through the clouds I see love shine
It keeps me warm as life grows colder
In my life there’s been heartache and pain
I don’t know if I can face it again
Can’t stop now, I’ve traveled so far
To change this lonely life
I wanna know what love is
I want you to show me
I wanna feel what love is
I know you can show me
I’m gonna take a little time
A little time to look around me
I’ve got nowhere left to hide
It looks like love has finally found me
In my life there’s been heartache and pain
I don’t know if I can face it again
I can’t stop now, I’ve traveled so far
To change this lonely life
I wanna know what love is
I want you to show me
I wanna feel what love is
I know you can show me
I wanna know what love is
I want you to show me
And I wanna feel, I want to feel what love is
And I know, I know you can show me
Let’s talk about love
I wanna know what love is, the love that you feel inside
I want you to show me, and I’m feeling so much love
I wanna feel what love is, no, you just cannot hide
I know you can show me, yeah
I wanna know what love is, let’s talk about love
I want you to show me, I wanna feel it too
I wanna feel what love is, I want to feel it too
And I know and I know, I know you can show me
Show me love is real, yeah
I wanna know what love is...
Well, don't we (those who are still searching for the person to share the life and love with) all feel the same too?
And as a consolation, listen to the song by Jennifer Warnes by the title of Somewhere, Somebody.
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