Sunday, October 16, 2005

Troubled by troubles

Do I attract troubles or troubles attract me? All I know is that I am in trouble. My own problems aside, I have to deal with troubles of others. If I am not careful or if I am too kind, the troubles can be mine. I am so in trouble as it is, now more with troubles which are none of mine. Arrghh!

Is it my karma? Is it another test or challenge from God? Or just me being stupid as always? Or I am really that vulnerable?

I want to help and I want to say NO! If I help, I know it will not help at all, yet if I don't help, then it is really helpless.

Perhaps I am being used again, as always. If yes, I am again the stupidest person on this earth. I begin to believe that I am.

I wonder why I even care!? Sigh! Kindness always gets me in trouble. If only I have a heart of stone, uncompassionate and unmoveable. I wonder what I be then? Perhaps so, I am neither obliged to help nor troubled.

Now, if I am in trouble, I wonder if anyone will help me in return or they will walk away or tell me adverse advice when they dunno much.

Sometimes, I wish troubles will leave me alone and seek another prey or victim. I am not strong enough to handle troubles yet I am weak enough to be thrown with troubles.

Now, can you see the troubles I am into? Back to my earlier question - Do I attract troubles or trouble attract me?

krazie*angel gotta learn to say NO

1 comment:

ace said...

Trouble doesn't choose its prey, it just fires all of us in different ways, least expected usually.. Damnit..