Friday, September 30, 2005

My blog

Blogging has been very therapeutic to me in many ways. It has helped me to keep myself occupied when I am idling around. It makes my mind spin a little when I am dulling away. It keeps me realise that I am still alive when I lose meanings in life. It keeps Internet exciting for me when I have nothing else to surf. It kept me company when I feel so lonely and empty. It makes all my insomniac nites bearable. It prevent me from driving around the city in the middle of the nite when I am down.

Through blogging I could express myself and record down things I would like to remember. This blog is where I write about the happier stuff in my life, the less grey sky of mine. Kinda like a junkyard where I store bits and pieces of my memories, thoughts, fantasies and happenings. I tried to be honest and open at all times. Please don't judge me when you know me too well from my posts.

Although writing is not something that I am good at nor enjoy, but blogging so far has done good for me.

I hope by blogging I am not offending anyone or seem like attacking anyone or putting anyone in any unfavourable position. If my blog is not your cup of tea, you are free to abandon it. If you like it, then you must welcome to torture yourself with my nonsense. If you agree with me, make my day and send me a comment to encourage me. If you disagree, make me see the other point of view by sending me your comment.

My previous infamous post had created some fire. For goodness or otherwise, I appreciate all the comments. I guess you commented coz you cared.

I hope I can continue to blog. I hope that blogging will remain something good and right to do.

If I have in anyway offended anyone in this blog, or any other blog I participated in, I would like to apologise. I have no intention whatsoever to cause hurt or anger or pain to anyone.

krazie*angel also KPC on other people's blog

Thursday, September 29, 2005

More on me being THIN

I am in serious trouble. Just yesterday, 4 people told me that I am too thin again.

Person 1:
Cherub saw me for lunch and she was shocked. "krazie*angel, what happened to you? You're so thin, you look so haggard and old!", she claimed.

Person 2:
Boss saw me and shouted. (*pst* - he is always on the over reacting side) "AIYOH! YOU ARE SO THIN, IT IS SO DISGUSTING. WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU. YOU ARE SO THIN LIKE A SNAKE!", he shouted and prolly repeated the statement at least 3 times.

I just looked at him and smile sweetly. Like a snake! Me? What else you expect me to say to this man?

Person 3:
Papa: Eat more. You are too thin.
krazie*angel: (In Mandarin) Err, last time you said I was too fat and you asked me to eat less and exercise more. Now you said I am too thin.
Papa: (In Mandarin) Last time you are fat, but now you are too thin. Eat more.
krazie*angel: ....

Person 4:
V: You are too thin. If you on a bit of flesh, you'll look sexier.
krazie*angel: (point to a chubby girl) Fat like that arr?
V: That is too fat.
krazie*angel: Then you said I am too thin?
V: If you strip you naked and let you wear shorts, and cut your hair short, you will be mistaken as a skinny boy. Get the picture?
krazie*angel: Wah, really arr?

krazie*angel is not thin but slim lah

Atypical love story

Based on the script from the movie, Van Helsing, I concocted it a bit so that it can fit into a totally different plot and scene of atypical love movie.

B, the hero and J, the heroine fell madly in love. They have the most romantic and loving moments that could melt any heart. They both went through all kind of problems you could possibly think of. Break-ups, separation, secrecy, jealousy, anger, fights, battle of words, insanity, family's objection and sadness - they have braced and gone through all of them. These only made their love for each other stronger, so thought J. But B's love for J is dying slowly.

One sad day, B told J that he wanna end their relationship as he know that they are never meant to be together, so thought B.

Three months later, B had moved on and let go while J had foolishly hanging on and unwilling to let go, hoping that a miracle would happen to bring them back together again.

Briefly a few more months later, B is getting married to someone else he barely know, an arranged marriage. He is now looking forward to building a new life with his new wife. Soon they will have a new family. J cried every tears she had every night when she learnt the news. She died the day she learnt the news. Now J is an empty space.

One rainy day, with thunder and lightning, they met for the final time. This is what they spoke to each other.

B: For me this is all personal. It's all about family and honor. Why do you do it? What do you hope to get out of it?
J: Oh, I don't know. Maybe some self-realization.
B: And what have you got out of it so far?
J: Nightmares.

Papa and Mom

Papa loves to watch TV. CCTV and all the China related news, programmes and dramas. He loves debats and discussion type of programmes especially pertaining to China. Every other day, papa will ask me to log in to Magnum 4D, Sports Toto and PMP website to check for the results.

Mom sleeps early. She is more discipline. She tries to brisk walk every morning. She loves watching Chinese TV dramas and recently Korean dramas. She seems to wash anything that can be washed in my apartment.

Papa go out to eat lunch. Mom rather stay home coz it is too hot outside.

Papa don't mind spending money buying numbers but complaint that food in KL are expensive. Mom prefers to cook and eat lightly at home coz she claims outside food are not nutritious and unhygienic.

Mom makes or buy breakfast for papa and me. Papa eat what mom buy or made but never make breakfast for mom.

Mom and papa love to be clean. They clean every single thing in my apartment, every day.

Mom drinks lotsa water. Papa had to be forced to drink water. Both afraid of cold so they don't need air-cond when sleeping at nite. Neither of them need blankets too.

That's my papa and mom. Nice, very shy, simple and humble people.

All I need to know is that they love me and care for me and my siblings so much. I feel like I am 5 years old everyday.

krazie*angel wanna say this to papa and mom - I love you both very much!*hugz*

Wednesday, September 28, 2005


I am wide awake again on a boring lonely night where most people have already retreated to slumberland. What do you do in a nite like this? I can't watch TV or listen to music coz I dowan to wake my parents up. I can't go out coz they will be worried. I can't call anyone coz it is totally rude to call people up at this ungodly hour.

I am currently confined to my room, with my notebook and the Internet.

When I am online, I felt extremely connected and close with someone as I can see him in the same cyberspace as me. Silly, I know. That I am, always... (is this also negative thots?!?!)

And I am so hungry. I wish I can eat curry laksa now, with kerang please.

krazie*angel so tempted to take sleeping pill but nah!...

Tuesday, September 27, 2005

Comment # 3 : You think Negatively

I often heard people telling me that I am too positive and too agressive. Always very sure what I wanted. Up to a point, I intimidate some people.

Now, I heard people telling me that I think negatively, especially about myself. That I don't believe I can do the things I want to do.

What had happened to me, really? Well, based on my own self analysis, the old me has fade away, and now I am a mellow new me. Didn't they used to dislike me because of my old self whom some claimed to be bitchy, harsh, direct, temperamental, demanding and arrogant, err... many many more? I seriously thought I changed for the better - less stressful, lower expectation and I don't talk ONLY about work anymore. I begin to have other priorities in life rather than work and achieving work related targets.

Mom was telling me to write a big "I CAN" on my mirror in my bathroom so that I can look at myself and say "I CAN". My cousin said I should answer positively and not negatively.

A friend even told me that I project such negative and low impression of myself, making others perceived me as weak and uninteresting.

Gosh. I am worried for myself. Am I being so negative that I listen to others and begin to think of myself more negatively? Or Am I just really negative?

If I am negative, won't it be good for others to tell me something great about myself so that I can start believing in myself again? Or am I too negative that I became ignorant that people are saying something good about me? Or is it that I am too positive that I refused to listen to other that I am negative.

I think I am just being honest about how I feel about myself, not being negative, but stating what I truly believe about myself based on the results and happenings of myself. Or I have to start believing that nothing is impossible and everything is possible, so I must be positive about myself and about life. Thus, being negative is also a possibility, isn't it?

This positive and negative mindsets are giving me a headache. *ouch*

krazie*angel is negatively positive that she is positively negative. Gosh, did I get it right *headache*

Hope Springs Eternal

What does it actually mean? I like the phrase. If I inteprete it correctly, I am like that. I have hope like that now despite what I am going through or despite what I am feeling.

Is it good to have hope like that? Or just plain stupidity?

Shed some light on me, please...

From the Internet, these are what I found...

The New Dictionary of Cultural Literacy, Third Edition, 2002 defines

Hope springs eternal


People always hope for the best, even in the face of adversity. This saying is from “An Essay on Man,” by Alexander Pope.

Hope springs eternal in the human breast;
Man never Is, but always To be blest:
The soul, uneasy and confin'd from home,
Rests and expatiates in a life to come.

~ Alexander Pope, An Essay on Man, Epistle I, 1733

krazie*angel remains hopeful always

Monday, September 26, 2005

Comment # 2 : Too thin

I used to have round bulging tummy. People would tell me that my tummy are big and I have to do sit ups to flatten my tummy. It was awful. Even my mom and dad will asked me to reduce my food intake and exercise. I must admit that my tummy was quite obviously round and big.

Now, I lost it. No more tummy. I can wear into those body hugging t-shirt without getting worried if my tummy is obvious. But most of my pants are getting a bit too loose for me now. But I still wear them, just need to pull them up once in a while :P

I have heard at least 5 people telling me now that I am too thin and I need to gain weight. Am I that skinny arr?

Some even said I will look haggard if I am too thin. I think so especially if your cheeks sunken in due to less fat on the face.

I am so sure if I eat and eat and eat, the only place that will grow will be my tummy. So how?

Thin or tummy? Err, I chose thin.

krazie*angel's tip on losing your waistline - lose your apetite!

Family Weekend Getaway

For the first time in my life, my entire family, cousins, uncles and aunties are planning to go on a family weekend getaway. It is very exciting yet very unfamiliar. We often meet up for dinner or get together at someone's home or during CNY at grandma's home but never an entire weekend together on holiday.

Well, I was appointed the organiser of this trip. Sounds cool but I can foresee some issues, but what the heck. I seem to be the free-est person at work and at home.

Since we had our big family gathering on the weekend, we have confirmed going to a nice place, so that was easy. Now I have to make sure I can secure the place and a good deal for everyone.

I just hope we can make this trip happen and that we will have a great time together.

krazie*angel dreamt about the entire family going on holiday last nite...zzz...

Sunday, September 25, 2005

Comment # 1 : Low Self Aura

Lately I begin to take note that people are giving comments about me and on what I should do. Previously, there isn't much or probably I never bother to heed them. But I guess if I am looking in improving myself, I sometimes, must listen to feedback from others about me.

I guess it is time to listen and evaluate myself. I am not able to help myself, so maybe other people can. I have been to egoistic to listen to others as I trust myself more.

I am going to blog about them. It might be exposing my weaknesses to the public but I guess it is only a weakness if I am too proud to admit or to even do the simplest thing, listen. I must sieve carefully the remarks or comments or feedback I hear from others.

Well here is the first remark I heard...

Someone told me that she could sense that I have low personal aura. She recommended ways to improve my aura. She said it could be due to some problems that I could be facing or I was feeling down. Well, how did she know that? Anyway, I acted cool and gave her my most skeptical facce and said, "Really meh?"

One of the way to improve my aura was to put on make up. My goodness. I frowned at that thought. I don't make up and I don't know how to and I don't think I want to. She said a little bit of light make up for e.g. eye shadow, blusher and lipstick are the basics. I still frown.

I went home and did facial. Ha ha ha. Maybe that can help improve my aura, I hope.

Another way was to wear some simple jewellery, but never over decorate like a christmas tree. Ok, I do that. I wear necklaces, earings and rings most time.

She also suggested that pampering oneself like going to the hair saloon to have a hair wash is good. So is pedicure and manicure. Ok, I indulge in these stuff most time. In fact, they burn a big hole in my wallet each month.

Most importantly, I must think, feel and speak positively. I can do that, in fact, I can even pretend too. This will be another subject about people's comment about me - my positiveness.

And lastly, smile always. Smile radiates good feeling. But my advice to you is that please don't simply simply smile coz you might be mistaken as a mad person. I will try to smile more often and to more people : )

krazie*angel wonders if crystal can improve self aura. These aura stuff giving krazie*angel a big headache.

Saturday, September 24, 2005

Friends from the past

I met a very old friend of mine last evening. She was my classmate when I was in Upper Six and then we both were coursemate in Uni for the next 4 years. We were always teamates for projects and did many papers together.

I saw her walking with her mom. I called out to her and she immediately recognised me. That's great. Actually she still look the same. We spoke a bit and check out a bit who and what has been happening since we left Uni. She remain in the same line of industry which we graduated from. I never work in the line of industry.

I must say her mom still look elegant and composed as I have always remembered. But I am sad to learn that her dad has passed away due to lung cancer. I used to go to her house and her dad will talk to me for hours. She would forbid me to speak to her dad because of the long hours. Anyway, may God bless his soul.

I gotta meet up with her again. It was good to see her again.

A few months ago, my best friend in secondary school contacted me on my mobile. It was just fantastic. She lives in the neighbouring country, not far down south, happily married. She too remain the same as how I have remembered her. Now we are speaking regularly on chat. We hope to meet up in person, but I guess the ball is in my court. Probably she will be reading this too. Hi there, C!

If you think someone, an old friend, frequently enough, she/he might just appear right in front you in the most pleasant way. This is just an unproved theory of mine.

krazie*angel hope to meet more old friends from schooldays.

Thursday, September 22, 2005

What I am up to...

I am back again.

Since last Thursday till last Sunday, I was away for my diving trip at Lang Temgah. I just can't seem to stop thinking about it. I guess it was the highlight of my life currently amidst the roller coaster emotional trip that I have been riding through lately. Plus I saw whale shark. This is like so rare, a chance of a lifetime. I got a photo of Mr Whale Shark as my wallpaper. He is lovely. The funny thing is that, I only realised how significant the moment was until I was home.

I couldn't write on Monday coz I was really upset, well, more like, devastated by a news I received. I couldn't handle it for the next 48 hours. But I am stable now, although, I am still hurting and sad. I am thankful for my family, they were there for me all the time, making sure I am ok. I might sound ungrateful, but despite all the love I have been receiving from my family, there is an emptiness that can't be filled and a despair in me that can't be removed by them.

So, I was on MC on Tuesday and Wednesday (yesterday). I had bad headache + migraine, or whatever you wanna call it. I just felt like shit. This doctor was smart, he detected that I was feeling more than the headache + migraine. He talked and digged, well, he did made me talk about how I am feeling. He gave me a long lecture and I knew them all too well, but how come, my mind and heart felt like shunning them all away.

Right now, I can't sleep, as usual. My mind is so messy yet fuzzy. Doctor prescribed me some sleeping tablets but I did not take it. I am afraid I am dependent on them. And I am sneezing and having running nose. I hope I am not falling ill.

I missed my F language classes this week and I had test yesterday. I really have no mood to attend them. Suddenly, learning French is pointless. What for? Why do I have to torture myself to learn a language that I can barely speak even after I have been learning it for a year. I have decided to take it easy. Learning for the sake of fun, and not for the sake of the need to acquiring or achieving targets.

I went to see the Maltese puppy this afternoon at the pet shop. She was gone already. Someone bought her, I guess. Her cage is now occupied by a Pekingnese. I had no interest in it. I went home feeling sad for losing the cute Maltese puppy, altho' I had never own it, but saw only once. Well, she is better off with a loving owner than being caged there.

Oh yeah, a fellow diver recommended me this singer, James Blunt. He said I will like him. I checked out his website and some song clips of his, and yes, I do like his songs. His lyrics are good. So, friends, check James Blunt out too. His album is called Back to Bedlam.

krazie*angel loves both the tracks of "Goodbye My Lover" & "Rain & Tears" of James Blunt. Nice lyrics.

Wednesday, September 14, 2005

Clumsy me.

What a clumsy me today!

Today at lunch, I decided to eat fruits only coz I had little apetite. When I was about to pay, I dropped some of my guavas on the floor as I was searching for coins in my wallet. When I tried to save the remaining guavas in the plastic, I dropped all my coins in my wallet.

Wah lau weh, so embarassing. The place was crowded and I guessed no one appreciate one clumsy girl blocking the way. Everyone just stared at me. Inside, I wanted to say, "Wei, help lah, see what!?" but me, with the heart of a chicken, just smiled sheepishly and picked up all my coins on the floor.

That's not it. When I went to my office, while I was enjoying my papaya, suddenly one piece fell and landed on my shirt. Aiyoh! Had to clean it before it stain my shirt.

I think today my mind is elsewhere. Only my empty head is attached to my neck. Actually, everyday also like that.

krazie*angel hope clumsy things don't come in three. Two is enough

Tuesday, September 13, 2005

Million Dollar Baby

Last nite was Monday nite and like I have mentioned in my earlier post, I did finished watching the movie "Million Dollar Baby"

It is inspiring, yet very depressing. It was a slow paced movie, yet it is rather captivating. It didn't make me sleepy or bored. It is rather dark and colourless, unlike Charlie and the Chocolate Factory - a hyper colour movie.

It shows how a woman who had an undying determination, positive mind and high spirit no matter how hard she has to toil or how difficult the hurdles are that she has to face. Just so unbearable to see that despite all the effort and the greatness she has poured into making her life better as well as to those around her, she was reduced to nothingness where she was paralysed. Her state of health slowly take away her feet which was swollen with gangrene.

She wanted to end her life, not because she gave up hope, but she knew she had done what she had never dreamed of. She had made it and had been there. She want to remember it before she couldn't anymore.

She was a fighter. But at the end, all of hers are taken away from her. It was wrong to end one's life, but in this movie, it justified why she should end her life. You will want to do that for her, to save her from the loss of dignity against her own will and in grace for her.

The movie is deeper than what is shown. The mystery of human spirit - the power, the weakness and the reason that drives human to do the impossible in adversity.

You have to watch the movie to experience human spirit - the hope, the will, the determination. I believe each one of us will inteprete the movie differently. Some of us might find it depressing, some will find it inspiring. Your call. Your say.

Hillary Swank is a fantastic actress and she deserves the credit.

krazie*angel's next movie is State Garden. Anyone has the DVD?

I want! I want!

I fell in love with a Maltese puppy I saw in a pet shop. I kept thinking of her.

She is about 2 months old, very young and small. She looks rather sad and lonely. When we put our hand on the glass panel, she gladly paw-paw us excitedly. She is so cute, so adorable, like a flush toy. When I placed my face (my cheek) on the glass panel, she rubbed her nose against the glass panel, then she paw-paw me up and down. She is so playful and loving too.

But she is so expensive. The shop is selling her around RM2,700. I can't afford her. Neither I have the space and time for her. We tried to snap some photos with the camera phone but it was blurry.

Anyway, I downloaded some photos of Maltese breed from the Internet. They are equally cute. Don't you love them? How could one resist such a cutie?

krazie*angel goes all melt for the puppy at the window. *woof* *woof*

Monday, September 12, 2005

Petaling Street under raid

Once in a while, it is nice to jalan-jalan at Petaling Street.

Most time, I dislike going there because it is always packed with humans, sweaty humans, to be precise. The lane in between stalls are really narrow and you can't help but rubbing against each other. And when you are out of the crazy narrow lanes, you are also sweating and had bought a few things that you don't really need, or some dvds that they claimed to be clear which are never clear.

Last evening, me and bman passed by the area and decided to take a walk there. It was quite a different sight from the usual busy Petaling Street. A lot of stalls were not there. There were not much people too. Apparently, there was a raid for any fake or imitation goods, be it handbags, t-shirts, watches, dvds, glasses, etc for 10 consecutive days. Last nite was the 3rd day.

So, there wasn't much to see. Bman bought me a fake Gucci handbag. It was nice and big. I like big handbags where I can throw everything in it. I bargained the price down to 50%. The lady claimed that it was made of genuine leather but it wasn't. Got cheated. It was not enough lighting to check if the leather is genuine. Should have tested it with a lighter. But anyway, it is a gift from bman and I am happy. I am using it already. Nice.

My colleague told me that you can also get TOD's imitation handbag there. She found one which she likes but did not buy it then. Well, don't go to Petaling Street these few days. Go again in October when the raid is over and business is back as usual.

krazie*angel should have bargained down to 75% for the handbag. Sigh! Too late.

E is dissapearing.

Oh no. The character "E" on the keyboard of my iBook is dissapearing. It looks like a short L now. I think the character "E" is used most often by me.

2 of my previous notebooks suffer the same fate, or even worse. Most characters are cleared away and people tend to find it hard to type coz they can't see where the characters are. Not a problem for me coz I can type without looking at the keyboard.

I don't have sweaty palms. Perhaps it is the hand lotion that I am using, but previously, I did not use any hand lotions. I suspect my fingers are producing acidic substance that can remove those alphabets on the keyboard. I try to wash my hands as often as I can.

BTW, how do you keep the white iBook white? There is a yellowish blotch on both sides where both my palms rest when I am typing. Eee...those blotches make my iBook so uncool. Right now, I have 2 pieces of white paper below my palms to avoid further staining.

krazie*angel checked her need to be cut immediately

Sunday, September 11, 2005

Double dose of "Millions"

Slept late again last nite. I am an insomniac nutcase. Bman cancelled his appointment to meet me earlier and I am a bit upset. But as consolation, he promised to meet me tomorrow late afternoon. I am looking forward to that.

Since I am not working on Sunday, I decided to watch a dvd which I bought at Sg Wang yesterday. It was a British movie called "Millions". Quite nice, those heartwarming with nice cute kids type of movies. Good for my state of emotion coz it can inject some positiveness into me.

After the movie, I am still so awake. So I decide to watch another movie...also with million in its title - "Million Dollar Baby". Also another inspiring movie, but somehow, I lost interest and stopped watching it halfway. Perhaps there is no good looking actor or actress in the movie. Will resume it again on Monday nite.

As of now, I am unsure if I should go to church or just skipped it. I could invite Chinoz to come along with me to the book fair in Alliance Francaise. Err, I choose to go to the book fair. I wanna see if I can get any second hand French movies or cheap easy reading French books.

Alrighty then, gotta go and get ready.

krazie*angel says sorry to God for skipping church. Please don't punish me, k?

Saturday, September 10, 2005

Saman - 50% Diskaun

Quick quick, go pay up your traffic summons. Got 50% discount for most type of offences except for running red lights. No discount at all for that offence. The discount is valid till September 22, I think.

You can check if you got summons via SMS. Very easy. Just type send to <32728>. The 32728 is the number equivalent to the word "dapat".

If you have to wait a long time to get the results, you can already guess that you actually have a lot of summons. If you want details of your summons, you can request for them. They will send you the instruction via SMS.

I got one saman for wrong parking, only RM30. Phew!

I hope I won't have anymore summons when I check at the counter.

Good luck.

krazie*angel doubt there is discount for her RM30 saman.

Too little money.

I wanted to withdraw money from an ATM. There was no queue, just a boy and his mother on the ATM. They were discussing how much they should withdraw, for quite a while. They looked worried. I waited patiently.

I managed to peek at the screen and saw that the bank account only has RM103.00. It is only the 2nd week of the month and they had so little left. They finally withdrew RM70 or RM80, I can't be sure. There are another 21 more days to go for this month, I wonder if they have enough money to survive? I wonder if they are happy despite they are poor. I hope they are happy.

It is so sad. I pity them. I wished that I could give them some money but how do you asked a stranger if they needed money? They might find you an angel or they might find you are humiliating them.

In that moment, despite my emotional state, I am thankful that I had a job that pays and if worse come to worst, I am sure I can rely on my family for finances. Won't die just yet.

I have to start counting my blessings. And I have to stop spending unnecessarily and start saving.

krazie*angel has to stop buying shoes - the 1st initiative

Can't sleep.

I can't sleep. It's 2.41am now. I surfed and there are so many things in the Internet but I am not sure what I wanna see. Stole some nice artworks from a deviantart site.

Both my kidneys are feeling sore now. Yikes.

I have been popping Poifull Jelly Beans to keep me un-bored. So so yummy. Mmm... sweet too and they explodes in your mouth with a nice light fruity taste. Love 'em. I gotta stop otherwise I might be diabetic tonite. But it is so addictive. I have to stop buying them.

I have also been drinking water and wee-wee all evening. I think I flushed the toilet way too many times by now. When there is nothing to do at home, I am all alone and awake while others are in slumberland, I realise that I tend to wee-wee a lot of times.

I gotta sleep. Got class tomorrow morning at 9am. As usual, I have yet to do my homework. I am so lazy. Not doing homework was what I was good at during my schooldays. Bad habits never dies, do they?

I can confirm now that I had a boring, lonely and bland Friday.

krazie*angel need to wee wee again :P

Friday, September 09, 2005

A lonely Friday nite

It's a Friday nite. And I am all alone at home, to be precise, in my room - a place of safe solace yet sometime, seems like my own prison.

Mom had gone back to stay with my bro and hopefully, will be back again to stay with me next week. It is weird that I kinda miss her presence although I barely had much time to spend with her when she was staying me for the past one week.

I've got no plans, no dates, no dinners, no partyings, no nothing. I am so lonely and bored. What do people do on a Friday nite? I bet most people are out there or with somebody. Frankly, it is unhealthy for me to be alone at this moment with how I am feeling. I have no mood for anything at the moment.

I have so commitedly attended my stupid F language classes in the evenings altho I have very little interest in learning it now because it kept my evening occupied and it made me tired, so that my mind won't wanders to crazy land.

I wished I can drink, alcohol, that is. It always make me high and sleepy, just the state of mind I need to be in at the moment. But, drinking always make me itch. I am so allergic to alcohol. I don't drink for a long long time coz the itch are really bad. I can't stand the itch.

I drank last nite, 2 cans of Carlsberg and they got me a bit happy and chirpy. So, I decided to live life a bit dangerously. I drove around KL and without my license. Considered me lucky or unlucky that no souls would come near me, I was safe. I itched a little but this morning, I had a pain on my back and I found that my kidney was infected when I went to the doctor. I had some problem for the past one week but never bother to do anything, so I guess drinking trigger it. And I barely drink any water at work yesterday. It all add up. So, no drinking, even little sips, for now.

Right now, in my own little world, the only thing that is keeping me company and sane is blogging and reading other people's blog.

I guess I am going to fall asleep next to my warm iBook again. I wish it is bman instead.

I hate to think if my tomorrow, next day, next next day and so on will be as lonely as yesterday, today and many nights before. I hate being alone and I never really gotten used to it either, just like traffic jam.

krazie*angel is down emotionally... give hugz please

Work or Home?

I am unwell today and got an MC for the day.

I have no mood to work. My work is boring.

But I am so bored at home.

After much pondering, I think I rather stay home.

If I do stay home, my mind will ramble away in warp speed downhill. Not a pleasant mood at all.

Still, I rather stay home and be lazy.

It is a luxury to stay away from work. I am going to grab it. I used to be stupid not to take any MC when I was sick. I even turned up at work when I had MC or was on annual leave. Work was always more important.

krazie*angel is getting lazier?!?!

Thursday, September 08, 2005


My Bloginality is ISTP!!!

I am such a sucker for astrology, personality tests and quizzes. When they say nice things, I wish they are true, I wanna believe that they are true. But most of the time, not true lah.

I was reading someone's blog, can't remember whose, and saw her bloginality. Bloginality? They seem to think of kind of things.

I was curious enough to click to check it out. I answered around 3 questions and voila, they told me my personality. Sure or not? Only 3 questions and my personality exposed.

Anyway, you can try it out yourself. Just for the sake of fun.

Car on fire, road jam

For the past 3 days, I have been attacked by traffic jam. Damn sien, man.

This morning, there was a traffic jam right after I left my house. In that small town of mine, what traffic jam? Today is "Drive Your Car Day" for OA town issit?

The traffic was heavy all the way to work and became stand still again where our grand National Library stood, which I have never borrowed a single book in my life. Darn it! Traffic Jam again!? Grrr!

Bumper to bumper, I began to be agitated. I will be late again. But what to do lah.

Under the same cursed lrt station, there was a red wira and a fire engine. Some firemen were putting out the fire on the car. No wonder lah traffic jam!

Then the road was smooth all the way. I have been staying and driving in this city for the past 14 years and I have yet to get use to the traffic jam. How lah!?

I gave in to mooncakes will was weak last nite. I was at KL Plaza, window shopping and there, nice booths in the center court selling mooncakes. They are everywhere.

I walked around admiring all the delicious mooncakes. So many varieties beyond your imagination. Finally, I succumbed to the sweet talking of the promoters of mooncakes and I bought 4 pieces of mooncakes that cost me around RM36 which consists of 1 piece of Low Sugar Gingko Lotus Paste with 1 Yolk, 1 piece of Red Bean, 1 piece of Tiramisu and 1 piece of Mocha.

And yes, they came with one nice wooden box which the promoter claimed was free. Free, my foot, I am so sure it has been costed into each and every pieces of mooncakes. I

I have yet to eat them. Maybe I will share the Gingko and Red Bean with mom when she return to stay with me again next week and the Tiramisu and Mocha with bman coz he likes coffee.

krazie*angel can't wait to dig her fingers into her mooncakes

Wednesday, September 07, 2005

Darn expensive mooncakes

I like to eat mooncake but they are so expensive. Saw them at Mid Valley Megamall this afternoon. One can cost at least RM9/- or more!!!

With that price, I could have paid for 3 lunch meals from Aci @ the roadside or the "Chao-chao" stall.


- "Aci @ the roadside" is an illegal stall by the roadside that sells home cooked Indian food. It is operated by a couple. We called the stall Aci, a term which we use to call the wife.

- "Chao-chao" stall is a chap-fan (which means mixed rice in Cantonese) stall situated in a building next to my office building. We called it "Chao-chao" which means smelly in Hokkien coz the cooking from the stall next to it creates strong stench that can even affect your body and clothes, making you smell like cooked cooking oil. Gosh! I hope you get what I am trying to say.

Allyfeel, my friend and colleague said people would laugh at me if they knew that I am willing to pay for scuba diving trips and not willing to buy a mooncake.

The truth is I really find mooncake is way too expensive and it is a luxury.

How come there are so many mooncakes being sold everywhere and the prices are still so expensive? Can they sell them all in the next 11 days or so?

Based on my observation, there are higher supply of mooncake than the demand from the consumer. If I remembered correctly from my Economics subject which I took during Form 6, if supply is higher than demand, then the price will come down.

But in this case, it is not happening like what I had learnt. Also, we are definitely paying for those fancy packaging!

I saw a small cute mooncake that is apple-shaped and flavoured as well. It cost RM9.90 each. Very nice and pretty. A novelty. I thought of buying it for bman as a Mid Autumn Festival gift but apple-flavoured & shaped mooncake isn't very mooncake-y!

So now, I am waiting to buy off season mooncake which usually cost half the price. But my colleague, Ms Goh has to potong stim for me by saying "Now they dowan to sell mooncake after the festival to protect their branding lah. Everyone knows that the price will go down, so they rather not sell."

What!? Aiyoh!

Anyway, I will hunt down the cheap mooncake at Tesco that Allyfeel recommended. Apparently only RM9.95 for 4 normal-sized mooncakes.

Meanwhile, I am hoping for free mooncakes from friends and relatives. I remembered we used to have so much lying around where everyone is so jelak to eat anymore.

krazie*angel is diverting her mooncake cravings by reminding herself the amount of sugar in each of those brown round thing

Very jam this morning

The traffic was very bad this morning!!! I was stuck in the jam when driving to work for 1 hr 35 mins. I could have reached Melaka. But I can't see any reasons for the bad traffic. There was no accident, rain, roadworks or break downs.

All my colleagues who drove came in late to work as well. Bad traffic all over KL? How can that be possible?

I almost puked sitting in the car, moving a few inch and halt for while all the way. Bumper to bumper. Arghh!

I hate traffic jam, really really hate, especially when I have to drive. Actually, I hate driving. So coupled with traffic jam, I absolutely despise driving during traffic jam.

This is one problem that our prime minister also can't solve, so I guess we have to just accept it.

krazie*angel dreaming of having her own driver

Tuesday, September 06, 2005

Kena punished arr?

While I was driving to work this morning, I was on the speakerphone talking away with my cousin regarding his son who is currently sitting for his UPSR exam. I was driving on the left lane. I saw the right lane was empty so I quickly cut into it. Then the Traffic Police who was manning the traffic stopped me, right in the middle of the road.

I thought to myself "Die!" and I immediately switched off my phone. Is it because I was talking on the phone? But I was using speakerphone. I mentally checked how much money I had on my wallet, just in case, if I need to bribe him. I don't have enough. "Shite, I have to beg and be so sweet to him when he talk to me" I planned in my head.

He signalled to me that I have cut from the left lane to the right lane. I wondered, "It is not double line mah. It is a broken line, so can cut, right?"

He just stood there right in front of my car. So I waited for the next course of action. He just stood there while directing the cars on the left lane to move ahead. I waited in my car, wondering what the heck he was trying to do. I looked at my rear mirror and saw a long queue of cars behind me. The guy in the car behind mine looked baffled too.

"Oh stupid policeman causing traffic jam!" I cursed inside me.

I analysed him. Mr Traffic Police is very young, taller than the usual Malay chaps, slim and lanky. I wondered again, "Hmm...maybe he is very young and inexperienced, that's why he did not want to speak to me"

I prayed for no trouble and that Mr Traffic Police will let me go quickly.

After 10 mins or less, Mr Traffic Police moved away and signalled me to drive ahead.

Sigh...why did he stopped me lah at the first place? Stupid or what?

Is he punishing me for cutting lanes? Anyway, better than he saman me or I bribe him. Losing 10 mins is definitely better than losing money.

If you wondered where did this happened in Jalan Pekeliling where the LRT station is.

krazie*angel gotta check when her driving license is expiring

Bday, Class, Dinner, etc etc

Today is just like any other day, but I have quite a fair bit of stuff to do. Let me see note down my today.

Today is Miki-C's birthday, so we sent her a dedication in our other blog. Happy Birthday to you, Miki-C. Hope you had a great day and a wonderful year ahead.

This morning, mom made me bread with crispy chicken floss and shreded cucumber. 4 big pieces. I normally skip breakfast but how to say no to mom whom has taken the trouble to make breakfast? But I only took 3 pieces. It was a lot!

This morning, my colleague brought me a bowl of rice with mixed stuff - small pieces of lup cheong, carrot, dried shrimp and french beans. I ate it coz she said cannot keep till afternoon. So I ate it there and then.

I also decided to eat mom's bread after the rice so that I will be too full to eat lunch. For lunch I ate mango only. RM2 for one packet of unripe mango!

This evening, I have my F language class. I am getting a bit bored with these classes. I have been having at least 3 evening classes per week for the past 1 year. And I barely half way there. Just 1/4 of the journey to mastering the stupid F language at the moment.

Tonite, I am required to attend a dinner organised by MOH at Sheraton Subang. I am most relunctant to go but my boss' PA kept insisting and she sorta pressuring me by saying that my boss instructed me to go. "You must go. Boss said you must go." she would say. So I will have to rush there after my class tonite. How troublesome. Furthermore, I am not dressed for the occassion. How lah!?

I got a lot of homeworks pending for my F language class. But I am so lazy to move my butt. So leceh and susah! Arghh! I am going to class and tell the teacher that I am too lazy to do it. The most I will promise my teacher that I will submit it next week. Sigh! Remind me of schooldays. How boring!

Tonite, I hope to see bman. Let's see how, but I think most probably not. This evening is way too occupied. Otherwise, I can call him and we can chat over the phone when I get home tonite. So, at this moment, the best I can do is to hope to see him tomorrow. Absence make the heart grow fonder, that's for sure. I miss him a lot.

krazie*angel desperately needs a good excuse for not attending dinner